The Stares

Our family is as normal as normal can be to us. But we are unique and we know it. Our two youngest children are bi racial, and many times we travel with one or two extra. Its amazing how many stares we get.

I have noticed this before but not as much as I have on this cruise. Walking along I have my beautiful “brown children” in front of me bouncing and hopping and calling me momma. My oldest behind me and as we walk along the heads just turned. I am not sure what they were looking at, but the looks always start with my two little ones and go to me.
What’s funny about this is it really is not that uncommon for a black and white to have babies together. In fact in England and Bahamas’ it is more common than I knew.
It is always more fun the stares when the whole family is together. Dan went grey early in life, so when they see two white people with two black babies….different ideas pop up.
Like maybe they are raising grand babies. Or foster care or adopted.
My favorite is when we are asked “so where did you get them?”
I know what they mean and chuckle inside when ask that question. And little do they know it opens the door to share my story!
The stares bother me more when it is directed in a mean way, typically directed toward my youngest. Isaiah has issues with transition and has quite the mouth on him. But I am learning to ignore the bad stares and smile at the curious ones.
This is my family….stare all you want cause we got a story to tell.

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What do I do with all this hair?

I was giving AnQuenette a bath tonight and getting ready to wash her hair and was amazed at how far she and I had come with her hair.   AnQuenette is bi-racial and has beautiful curly hair.  Before she first came to us, her hair was always “done.”  It was straighten and curled, and relaxed and braided.  Not that any of that is bad or wrong, but for a two-year old, it was a lot.

We are not sure of all the history, but soon after she came to us she started pulling out her hair.  This is called Trichotillomania.  She basically pulled out the bottom part of her hair and then ate it.  She was bald  in the bottom part.  We were able to get that under control once she got settled in life.

She would not let anyone wash her hair but me.  Once she let the Golden Girls (no not the real ones, but my golden girls-also her God sister’s who are bi-racial too) wash and braid her hair.  It was so pretty, but soon after she came home something triggered something, she had a hour melt down and pulled out one of the braids.  I decided that I was going to rush her into getting her hair down in any way.  When she is older she can make these decisions, but for now her hair is beautiful and we want her to be proud of her hair just as it is.  (It is the whole inner beauty that I want her to experience-that God made her special and not to let anyone tell her she needs to do anything to be beautiful.)

Now her other God mother does her hair for me.  Last year after she broke her arm, I had to take her to the hair dresser to get it washed since it was hard keeping her arm up so it didn’t get wet.  She liked having them wash it, and so finally she let Ms. Bobbie wash it.  Now she has been working on what style for the special dinners on the cruise!  She can make these ringlets in her hair, like Nelly on Little House on the Prairie.

I know that when I first got her I wondered what am I going to do with all this hair?  I had never experience caring for biracial hair before (well Isaiah, but his hair is more like mine but curly).  After doing research, talking to many people, looking on youtube, and trying many products, I have settled on the Miss. Jessie line.  Their Baby Buttercream works well in her hair.

Check out my Store for more of the products from Miss. Jessie.


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How to wash all that hair

When AnQuenette came to us I wondered “What am I going to do with all that hair?

Well here is how we do it now.
You need
Wide comb
Shampoo and conditioner. We use Miss Jessie or Suave.
Miss Jessie Baby buttercream

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We wet hair and wash. Anquenette helps quite a bit now in washing her hair.  Soon she will be solo on this!
Then we rise it.

I put conditioner in and let it sit for about 4 minutes. I use a lot.
Then use the comb I carefully comb through her hair.

Rise and towel dry.
I put in the butter cream.
Tonight she wanted just a pony tail so I pulled it up.

 

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